So this all got a little bit silly and there’s no need to say much more other than to introduce some of the personalities that turned up:
Gussie Thinknotall – 3rd Duke of Shuthonger, (Twinned with Craphonger in France), Laird of the Manor
Like the estate, getting a little long in the tooth. Avery poor (but selective) memory. Began to remember the guests of the party as they were introduced. Seemed to have had some sort of “relations” with all of the womenfolk. Had been brought up in the Briish Empire and in particular “KEENYAA”. A man of the countryside, had inherited the Shuthonger estate and looks after livestock – whilst indulging in his favourite pastime of Cow Tipping. A family man – but not necessarily his own family.
Roger Sutherland DCO DISCO
Gate-crashed the party believing that he knew nobody, not even the host. Left the party realising that both his father and brother were at the party.
Mother from the Congo, father from Greenland (or maybe the other way round). They met in Burma during the third Civil War of that country.
He was brought up in that country in harsh conditions, although it was an idyllic childhood. Abandoned at the age of twelve, resorted to swimming across the Atlantic to find a new life in Tewkesbury.
Felicity Rose McDonald of Clan McDonald (don’t you know!)
Gussie and I shared debutante balls and all sorts of shenanigans took place behind the bushes. Our adjoining estates has meant that we have been close friends for years.
“BUZZ” Alltocock
An eccentric inventor who met Gussie at a conference in New York. A strange mix of Australian and Essex parentage, Buzz was credited with the ultimately useless invention of the cardboard bath and biodegradable snooker ball. Buzz and Gussie spent a memorable evening with Kirsty Goodtime and Tracy Tuck-in – known in new York as the Early Slurp girls. Gussie subsequently credited Buzz with the invention of one or two other things that night! Having not seen each other for over 10 years, Buzz and Gussie met 3 days ago at the local pub and was kindly invited to the party.
Alice Fitz-Blackout
Illegitimate daughter of Felicity Rose McDonald and Gussie Thinknotall – they weren’t just kissing behind the bushes at the debutant ball! Gussie gave Alice a stables (out of guilt) furnished with several thoroughbred hunters. She left dinner early, embarrassed, regarding the revelation of her parentage – and needing get up early to muck out the horses in preparation for the hunt. Alice is also having an affair with Norman Price, the Gamekeeper who provided the venison for dinner. He was obviously unable to attend the dinner being NQOCD and not of the PLU clan.
Miss. Arabella Lipstick-on-Teeth
Spinster. School mistress in the village primary, St. Winifred’s, Shuthonger . Comes across as quiet, shy, pop-sock type but behind the scenes is the local good-time-girl. Often seen in the pub entertaining a few too many port and lemons.
Gives one-to-one tutorials to most of the children in the village (and to their fathers too.) Met Gussie at Parent’s evening – good opportunity to get to know him as he was there most of the evening discussing all his children – all have different mothers and make up the majority on roll at the school.
So there we are – a pretty eccentric weekend all round.
Ness Dutton
